It was the start of July. I had been thinking about asking Julie to marry me for over a year but whenever we talked about the future she always seemed vague and uninterested and would quickly change the subject. I thought that I would take the plunge, if she didn't want to get married then it would show her how much I cared and that I would always be there for her.

The ring was expensive and I had to buy it on credit, I figured it would be worth it though. I booked a table at an expensive restaurant and took her out. We had a really nice evening but I was so nervous and had a few glasses of wine - I almost didn't do it, what made it harder was that it was a Friday night and the restaurant was very busy. Half way through our dessert I stood up, knelt down and asked her. At first she thought I was joking and kept telling me to stop being such a fool but when I put the ring on her finger, that was when I knew that I had done the wrong thing, she was painfully embarrased and was really annoyed, she kept telling me that I'd made a fool out of both of us. The rest of the evening wasn't very nice at all and she hardly spoke to me.

I had to do a half-day at work the next day and when I got home I'd found she wasn't there, in fact, nothing of hers was there apart from a few of her magazines and hair products. I simply couldn't understand what had happened. I kept calling her but she wasn't answering her phone. She had a few friends of her own but none of them I really knew. I frantically phoned our friends but none of them knew what had happened. Later that evening one of her friends phoned, Nadine, and told me that Julie didn't want to speak to me or see me again and to stop trying to ring her. I was devastated. I took the following week off of work, I simply didn't know what to do with myself.

My friends and colleagues tried to comfort me but they couldn't answer any of my questions. I heard a couple of weeks later from one of our friends that she had spoken to Julie and that she was living in London with a friend. I don't know what has happened to the engagement ring, all I know is that it is going to take at least three years to pay off.

November 2003